Classic camel coat (and an IVF update)

classic fall winter fashion_camel coat slimming black pants

J.Crew Factory coat 00 petite (unfortunately no petites this year; similar option in petites), Uniqlo tee xs (see the “brown” color on me), Banana Republic pants 00p,Tory Burch purse on sale!, Ann Taylor bow pumps sz 5 (flats version)

Before I get back to regular outfit posts, I wanted to say thank you. I read each and every comment, direct message, and email in response to my last post, and was so moved by your warmth, support, and openness. Even though I may not have replied directly, please know that each message was uniquely meaningful to me. Your deeply personal stories allowed me to feel and share in your own incredible triumphs as well as heartache, in a way that’s amazing for women connecting through a blog.

For those who are interested, I wanted to occasionally share more of the highs and lows of the journey as we go. After leaving off with IVF egg retrieval in my last post, the next steps were to wait and see how many eggs fertilized, and then how many survived to day 5. In our case, the embryos that grow to day 5 are frozen to undergo optional genetic testing, which takes several weeks. Each embryo that’s deemed healthy can then be thawed and implanted into the uterus, where it will hopefully “stick.” At every waiting point along the way, there is almost always a dropoff.

Our doctor was able to retrieve 21 eggs last week. I was admittedly on a high, and allowed myself to feel oh so optimistic! But only 9 fertilized, and then yesterday while in the grocery store parking lot, I was told only 3 embryos survived to undergo testing (which means perhaps 1 or even none could make it to implantation). I couldn’t help but burst into tears right there – I was prepared for dropoff, but not quite so much. I know it’s ok and even important to cry at times, but your messages helped me find strength and regain positivity, as we continue down this uncertain road. So thank you again, from the bottom of our hearts.

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camel wool winter coat black outfit petite fashion blog

Leave a Comment

166 Comments

  1. Wentz wrote:

    Reading through your post ‘When Trying Is Trying’ is like reading my own story. My husband and I have been trying for 3 years but to no avail. The questioning from friends & family was never easy to swallow. And it doesn’t help that we are surrounded by friends and family who got pregnant easily without even trying (some holding on their babies on their 1st wedding anniversary).
    We embarked on the IVF journey in late 2016 after everything else failed and without insurance coverage. I’m also someone who is afraid of needles and understand that the daily injections and blood drawings never got easier. We have 5 Day 3 embryos, our clinic has a policy of stopping at Day 3 if there’s less than 6 Day 3 embryos. We transferred 2 embryos in Mar 2017 but it was not successful. I quit my job in May 2017 in hope the elimination of job stress will help. I also did a laparoscopic surgery in Jul 2017 to remove my ovarian cyst in hope it will increase my chances. I was terrified up to the point I was injected with sedative in the surgery room. In Oct 2017 we did a 2nd FET with 2 embryos. We have really high hopes this time around only to have our dream crushed.
    We have now switch to another clinic. This clinic has a policy of pushing all embryos to Day 5 . The doctor also advised us to perform genetic test on all the Day 5 embryos. While he said this will ensure only they select the best embryo to transfer, I’m secretly afraid this may also mean there’s a chance nothing will be left. We are set to start our 2nd IVF in Mar 2018. *praying hard*
    I’ve been secretly suffering in private for 3 years. Thanks for sharing your journey and giving me a chance to open up.
    From the bottom of my heart, I wish you & Nick all the best!

    Posted 1.5.18 Reply
  2. J wrote:

    Hi, I know this post has been up for a while, but I wanted to let you know you are not alone. We tried everything to conceive a child, from Clomid, to injectibles, to IUI. We made a final ditch effort at the end of all that with an IVF….which did not work. But a month after my IVF failed, I was spontaneously pregnant, and have a healthy 3 year old today. Don’t give up future mama, miracles happen.

    Posted 1.1.18 Reply
  3. Anonymous wrote:

    Jean – I’m sad to hear that you’re going through this, as I will be starting my IVF treatment in a couple weeks. I can definitely relate to all of the mixed emotions you’re feeling, because I feel like that all the time. I had a miscarriage last January and have been trying for a year since (already being married for 4 years). We then decided to see a specialist and found out that I have a very low ovarian reserve at just 29 years old and that I’ll never be able to conceive from my left ovary. But I’m hopeful for us and all the other women facing these circumstances all the luck and love along this difficult and emotional journey. Be strong and stay optimistic. I know its easier said then done, as I repeat that to myself everyday over and over. Take care

    Posted 12.7.17 Reply
  4. Mai wrote:

    Jen, hang in there. It’s a strenuous process, but well worth it. I only had 5 retrieved and 3 survived to a blastocyst which then through the genetic testing, we had 2 viable embryos. I’m now holding my 2 month little boy. The year it took through Ivf was extremely draining, but his smile makes me realize that this was a humbling experience and I look at the world in a more optimistic perspective. As you can never truly judge what a person is going through. Sending you well wishes!! Keep post updates💕

    Posted 11.30.17 Reply
  5. Two of my closest friends has been down the IVF road. They both had troubles with egg-harvesting. But the first one got 3 like on their 4th try. One of those became a beutiful strong boy. And the other 2 are still in i freezer somewhere.
    3 can be more than you need at this point. 🙂
    Good luck to you both

    Posted 11.30.17 Reply
  6. Anonymous wrote:

    Jean, I have been through the same emotional roller coaster as you and I understand everything you have been/are feeling. Although, I must admit that I was angry and bitter for sometime – it seemed unjust. My husband felt helpless but he was always there, at every appointment, during all the pricking and prodding and testing…he was there each step of the way. Like you I went through several less invasive procedures before attempting IVF. All the while wondering whether there was any point since my doctor told me that my ovarian reserve was incredibly low and diminishing by the minute. To put it bluntly, I had the ovaries of a 50-year-old. Thankfully, my obstetrician sister reminded me that all it takes is ONE egg, one single precious egg. I wasn’t even sure if I was able to produce any at all, but our first attempt produced just that. And this one and only egg is now a very healthy little boy of 4 and a half months. Don’t lose faith or hope and although some people do not dare broach the topic, they are probably thinking of you and your husband and praying for you. Lots of love from Paris

    Posted 11.23.17 Reply
  7. Ava wrote:

    I sporadically check my favorite fashion blogs and you’re one of them. I hadn’t visited yours in a bit and today when I saw this post I couldn’t Believe it. I just had my third IVF transfer today. It is a rollercoaster of a journey with tons of highs and lows. The first two transfers resulted in early miscarriages. Today I am full of hope but also know there is a possibility it just won’t take. At times i’ve found myself bawling and feeling hoplelesss but I always pick myself up and try again. It’s seriously going to hell and back but I’d do it all over if there is a chance I can get the babies i’ve Always longed for. It’s a rough and at times, lonely journey but you’re not alone and thank you for making me feel like I’m not either. Prayers and baby dust.

    Posted 11.22.17 Reply
  8. Fan from Cali wrote:

    Longtime fan of your blog and wanted to wish you best of luck! I currently have a 15 month old son via IVF. I also only had 3 viable embryos, 2 were implanted, but only one “stuck”. The journey definitely had highs and lows, but I’m so blessed to have my son and now I’m 31 weeks pregnant with a baby girl (naturally and definitely not planned!) I’m sure you’ve heard it before, but things definitely work out in its own crazy way and stay positive!

    Posted 11.21.17 Reply
  9. Veronica wrote:

    You are so brave and strong! hope your dream of being a mom comes true soon , don’t give up! it takes a lot of strength to share such a personal story

    Posted 11.20.17 Reply
  10. JB wrote:

    Hi Jean – This whole process sucks! I’m sorry you had to go through it too. I feel like it’s been a probability calculation exercise combined with lots educated guess work. You never know exactly why something is not working. My husband and I are going through it right now. With that said, it’s turly nice to see people talking about infertility more openly. We women have to do a lot of heavy lifting during this process, so it’s nice to be able to talk about it openly and share experiences. Anyway, I selfishly hope we get pregnant around the same time, so I can copy your pregnancy style 🙂 Good luck!

    Posted 11.19.17 Reply
  11. Lily wrote:

    I’m a long-time reader who has never actually posted a comment. Like many of the people who’ve posted, I went through this too. I remember how each month was filled with hope and then crushing disappointment, over and over. We finally did IVF. (In our case, we ended up with a doctor who specializes in minimal-stimulation IVF, which can be much easier on the body.) After our daughter (now 11) was born, all those months of frustration and despair — which had seemed all-consuming at the time — became just a distant memory. One way or another, that will happen for you too. The stress and worry and despair of these past months will just be a distant memory. I truly and sincerely wish you every happiness and joy.

    Posted 11.17.17 Reply
  12. Bestwishes wrote:

    I had only 1 made it to day 5 and 1 to day 7. Unfortunately the day 5 one Failed genetic test so they transferred the day 7 4bb embryo, the worst grade You could have for transfer. and doctor gave it 30% of chance. But now my day 7. 4bb is sleeping in her crib. It was a tough journey and hope your wishes come true.

    Posted 11.15.17 Reply
  13. Lorena wrote:

    Good vibes going your way !
    You look fabulous.

    Posted 11.15.17 Reply
  14. Thanks for sharing your journey with us. I’ve gone through two rounds of IVF. The second round was successful with a retrieval of 9 eggs and 3 implantations. We ended up with two healthy twin boys now age 6. Hang in there and don’t feel defeated.

    Posted 11.15.17 Reply
  15. Demidemi wrote:

    I have been following you since high school, and I had no idea how great of a reference this blog can be to me until I graduated this year and started living in NYC. I finally feel the need to get out of my canada goose jacket and experiment with some classy, chic professional wear. Thank you for doing this for us petite girls! This blog is beautiful as much as it is educational and practical. I have always felt uncomfortable being petite and this year, at the age of 22, is the first time that i actually come to terms with it and feel happy about it. Keep up the good work. What you are doing is truly great!

    Posted 11.14.17 Reply
  16. Elina wrote:

    Hi Jean,
    This is my first time ever writing a comment on your blog. I just want you to know that I’m rooting for you and your husband! Sending good thoughts your way and wishing you all the best!
    Thank you so much for sharing your story. We don’t hear about these enough and it’s important for us to be able to talk about these things openly so we know we aren’t alone.

    Posted 11.14.17 Reply
  17. P. wrote:

    Three is good! I am crossing everything for you. Please keep us posted. You are in my thoughts.

    Posted 11.14.17 Reply
  18. nebulae wrote:

    I wish you all the luck, Jean… I don’t have a husband and my prospects of ever having a baby are dwindling every day, as I’m already past my prime… I suffer in my own but similar to yours way…

    Posted 11.13.17 Reply
  19. Jewels wrote:

    Hi Jean,

    My husband and I are going through a similar process. We aren’t doing IVF at the moment, but a pill method to force ovulation. I too, tried every trick under the sun. I have PCOS…which we discovered after wondering why after 8 yrs no baby. I’ll be praying for you. I hope we both have something to celebrate, but regardless, I’m glad we are all in this together. You are not alone. Thank you for sharing your story. I’ve never felt closer to a “stranger” than I do with you.

    Posted 11.12.17 Reply
  20. Sheila wrote:

    Hi Jean~ Your story is so familiar! I was in your exact shoes. I remember moving into our new neighborhood and it seemed like every day someone was announcing they were pregnant or I was invited to a baby shower. I understand how sad and defeated it can make you.
    I got pregnant right away the first time then miscarried at 9 weeks. After that I couldn’t get pregnant for over a year, and we went down the IVF road. I got pregnant a couple of times, but miscarried. It’s a blur now, but at one point, in between cycles, I got pregnant naturally with our now 16 year old daughter! I had 4 frozen embryos left (out of 22 retrieved and 8 fertilized and 6 made it to blast stage) so we decided to try again when our daughter was one. Four thawed normally and the dr. implanted 3– I got pregnant with triplets! Sadly one of the three miscarried around 8 weeks, but I now have beautiful 14 1/2 year old twin boys! So I went from no babies to 3 in an instant!
    We had the same diagnosis as you– there did not seem to be any reason that we were not getting pregnant on our own. It’s tough because you feel like if something is wrong then you can do something to fix it, right? But! The good news is ~ there is nothing wrong! I have complete faith that you will have the family you want. It’s hard when it doesn’t happen on your timetable — but it will happen! I look back and wish that I didn’t spend so much time agonizing and reading everything I could about what to do so I would get pregnant. My poor husband! It is hard on them too. I wish I could tell you not to worry and just carry on with life and it will happen~ but I know that doesn’t work because that is what people said to me– how can you NOT think about it? One thing I will tell you that happened to me was this: I was sitting in my car one day doing paperwork ( I was a pharmaceutical sales rep). I looked up from what I was doing, and just then a man was walking by and he had a t shirt on that said:”Don’t worry, God is in control” It made me take a deep breath and realize that my worrying and anxiety were only hurting me. It wasn’t up to me or anything I did or didn’t do. It was going to happen when it happened, and it will be perfect when it does! As sad and as trying as it all was, I have the children I was meant to have and you will, too! I hope you find comfort in the support of your family , friends and blog followers. Keep the faith and know it will all work out!

    Posted 11.12.17 Reply
  21. kim wrote:

    Anyone have comment to add that it is maybe Ok to live without children ?

    Posted 11.12.17 Reply
  22. Nancy wrote:

    I know where you are as I’ve been there too. I was so surprised at the dramatic decline in numbers and waiting for each embryo update was so difficult. We went from 16 retrieved to 2 frozen. We should be doing our first FET before the end of the year. We are praying fiercely for a healthy baby. We are hoping and praying for a successful cycle for you and Nick too.

    Posted 11.12.17 Reply
  23. Jesmin Chowdhury wrote:

    Any suggestion regarding classic peacoat in petite size?

    Posted 11.12.17 Reply
  24. Rosa wrote:

    Jean,

    I’ve been a silent reader for a year. I just want to say thanks for sharing your story, it was very brave of you. Please keep us updated on your IVF progress. I am praying for you from Canada!

    Posted 11.11.17 Reply
  25. Karen wrote:

    Hi Jean. I told my sister before her last round of IVF this: Say to yourself at the end of this cycle you will have a baby. It will work. No negative thoughts, just be excited about having a child. Let yourself plan what the baby will wear; whether you will
    have a boy or girl or both!
    She surrounded herself with these happy thoughts and didn’t protect herself from the possibility of disappointment. She believes that attitude worked that final time and now she is one tired, but super happy mom.

    Posted 11.11.17 Reply
  26. Jen wrote:

    Dear Jean,
    I’ve been such a fan of yours but have never commented before. Reading your post brought back a flood of emotions. With my 3rd IVF cycle, I remember the devastation of hearing news that only 1 embryo was viable for transfer, out of 20 retrieved eggs. We had spent all our savings at that point and it was our last shot. I can still hear my doctor’s encouraging words that it only takes one and it did! I was very open about my IVF journey with my family and friends, which came with a lot of unsolicited and sometimes nonsensical advice, but it also came with a whole lot of love, support and encouragement. With that, my advice to you is to continue allowing yourself to have a good cry whenever you need it and to lean on those that love you the most. I wish you and Nick the best. xoxo

    Posted 11.11.17 Reply
  27. Anonymous wrote:

    Hi Jean,
    I’ve been following you since the beginning of your YouTube days and have never commented but this is a topic that’s near and dear to my heart having been through more than a dozen miscarriages, multiple IVF rounds and finally a surrogate using our own genetics to have our miracle baby. If there’s hope for me, I truly believe you’ll also be a mom one day soon. I’d like to share an article with you about PGS testing. It’s a relatively new finding which I found very interesting. https://www.thecut.com/2017/09/ivf-abnormal-embryos-new-last-chance.html

    Posted 11.11.17 Reply
  28. Sandy wrote:

    I applaud you for being so brave and public about your process I’ve been going through IVF for 4 years and am still on that journey and similar to your last post. We had very similar drop off each time. We currently have 3 good quality, genetically tested (day 5) Blastocysts and we’re doing and ERA procedure to find the exact right day of implantation to use so we increase our chances even more. We’ve had multiple miscarriages and the last day 5 Blastocyst didn’t even get me pregnant so we’re doing as much as we can. Not that it’s what you should do but everyone’s so different so please be patient. Not only that but each cycle is different too. I’ve been talking about everything with anyone and everyone and have found that it’s way more common that women need a little help these days but many are scared or more ashamed to talk about the struggle. Just putting it out there and letting the world know it’s more common than everyone thinks helps so many. I have found that posting the trials and tribulations in my Facebook group is as supportive as your posts here and the responses you get. So hats off to you and good luck on your journey, whatever happens!

    Posted 11.10.17 Reply
  29. MsMac wrote:

    Jean,
    Hello there, brave one!Reading your story reminded me of my own journey through infertility.Just as you said, I assumed it would be so easy to get pregnant.And when it didn’t happen we were shocked and heartbroken.I would cry looking at friend’s baby shower invitations.Being a pediatric surgeon and surrounded by children didn’t help the emotional situation.Plus the Asian blame game from the extended family that the stress of my career and the choice of waiting till I finished residency caused it.After several Clomid cycles, two IVF cycles, we finally got pregnant.We now have an adorable seven-year-old girl.My only advice to you is to take a mini vacation and rediscover each other.Do things that you love and make you happy, if that means being in your PJs all day long and surfing the net, so be it.Let your days not be surrounded by anticipation and fertility talk, decisions.Hoping things work out very soon.Good luck!

    Posted 11.10.17 Reply
  30. Erin wrote:

    Jean – I just wanted to say thank you so much for sharing your story. My husband and I are also dealing with infertility, and are (hopefully) going to begin IVF soon ourselves. This is all so overwhelming; I swear my emotions are all over the place and I haven’t even started yet! Every single day I find myself feeling sad that my body is so “broken”… jealous because it seems to happen so easily for everyone else… scared of the financial side of the process… and sometimes (irrationally) angry because I don’t understand why good, responsible, kind-hearted people should have to jump through all of these hoops for only a CHANCE at having a biological child. I’m sure you and Nick have had some of the same feelings, and I just want to say – I understand, and you are absolutely NOT alone.
    Wishing you guys the best of fortune in this crazy journey. And thanks again for sharing; your words have helped me more than you know!

    Posted 11.10.17 Reply
  31. A new friend wrote:

    Sending lots of love and hugs to you Jean. Your last post was incredibly powerful and I can’t imagine the enormous amount of courage and faith it must have taken to share your own personal journey with everyone. As someone who has been undergoing fertility treatments myself for the past two years I am able to relate to what you have experienced . With every phone call from the nurse post all the blood work and those extremely uncomfortable ultrasounds (come on, get out of my butt already!), we feel that slimmer of hope that maybe something in our body is finally working! Then inevitably that disappointment that hits us hard, and right at the heart.. On some days the disappointment overcomes every bit of courage and whatever hope is left. Giving up seems like the only remaining option on those days…it’s not easy to endure. Throughout my journey so far my family and friends’ unwavering support and unconditional love have made it possible for me to continue down this road, to believe in myself that it is possible, that I only need to persist. Growing up I’ve always heard my parents and adults around me say “Life is not easy”, and I’ve never truly understood what they meant until now at this chapter in my life. Life has proven it definitely does not COME easy, but it is worth fighting for! so after all the tears, heartaches and ice cream – let’s try again. Three very innocent words, though embedded with so much more meaning behind it to us. Though we are but strangers, I would like to thank you for being so open and trusting in us. Your post has given me newfound strength as I’m about to go through my first IVF, and has also reminded all of us ladies that we are truly not alone. My ginormous box of meds just arrived today and I have to say it’s not pretty, but whatever it takes I will try it because it will be worth it in the end. Please keep us posted on your journey! It will happen for us! Sending baby prayers and wishing you all the best!

    Posted 11.10.17 Reply
  32. Yolanda wrote:

    Best wishes to you Jean! And love your style as always

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  33. yilei wrote:

    would you mind tell me your bust? I want to buy the J.crew’s double-cloth wool lady day coat, but I’m not sure of the recommendation size of the official website, thanks!

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  34. Eva wrote:

    Dear Jean,
    Thank You so much for your honesty and your courage to share your story. I know exactly how you feel and you found just the right words to explain how someone feels who gets through the struggle of Infertility treatments. I have a PCO Syndrome and have had a lot of treatments, but unfortunately i am a high responder and got two times the OHSS so i have had a lot of eggs, also 21, but only 2 survived the freezing. Now, after ten years of trying, i learned that life goes on, even without being a mum, but its the hardest lesson i’ve learned. So i wish Nick and you all the best and much strength to carry on. A lot of LOVE from Germany. Eva

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  35. Lenka wrote:

    Hi Jean, don’t do the freezing process to fresh embryos in order to get them additionally genetically tested. Because defrosting makes them very much weaker to survive (and nest). It causes a lots of unnecessary failures. The good looking FRESH embryo gets the highest chance of surviving and nesting. Sometimes doctors “over-analyze” it and it only cost extra money and do more damage.. There are tests which can be done without freezing and healthy pregnancy (once it starts) doesn’t need a super special care… I had more health problems and failures with all the unnecessary extra things than with the try which involved only the basic medication and AH (assist. hatching). I know it’s not easy to have all the advice from many strange persons and each of us has a different experience, needs, opinions, bodies…and/but we all want you to be a happy mum 😉 On the other side you can also choose not to take it or maybe you find something interesting too. The personal experience is just yours as well as the decision. I hope for you and the best. With warm regards, L.

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  36. Anonymous wrote:

    Sending lots of love and positive vibes your way!!!!

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  37. My wrote:

    You’re so beautiful and strong Jean! I love following your post! Please keep sharing your journey with us. Lots of prayers and hopes for you. xoxox

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  38. Cindy wrote:

    Love your outfits as usual ! I left a message on your initial IVF post as I’m going through the same thing where I’ll go under IVF in the next few months. Your post brought me some optimism and hope and will send good vibes your way.

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  39. GMK wrote:

    Hi Jean,

    Reading your posts caused a wave of emotions for me. Infertility is such a lonely, trying, life changing journey. What continues to surprise me is how common it really is – people hardly talk about it but the moment you step into a fertility clinic or read online forums, you see folks just like you – in exactly the same boat. I still found it to be singularly isolating.

    My husband and I struggled to get pregnant for almost three years. Every one of those years, I naively “resolved” that this year was going to be it. This past Jan, I didn’t even try.

    Here are some of the things I learned that I wanted to share:
    1. Try not to raise your expectations because a friend or acquaintance got pregnant naturally, or on their first try with IVF, or from a certain medication or whatever. The brutal yet sadly, honest truth about infertility is that it is a unique journey and while its heartening to see other people succeed, it caused me more pain and hopelessness when none of these miraculous things happened to me.
    2. Acknowledge that this will be mentally challenging – I fought my sense of disappointment and envy a lot, before I realized that this is my truth and we will need to figure out our own path and that its okay. If there are days you want to wallow, its okay. If there are days you want to hate other people because they got pregnant when they weren’t even trying, its okay too. Let yourself hurt and heal instead of putting too much on yourself.
    3. This experience can be really tough on your marriage, not because your partner is uninvolved or uncaring, but because the poking, the body changes, the dreams, the injections post-transfers, the constant checking-of-symptoms-to-see-if-this-indicates-I’m-pregnant will be happening to YOUR BODY. My husband is the most treasured part of my life, but he just could not relate to some of these things, and they didn’t occupy his brain 24×7 like they did mine. Communicate, express your thoughts, talk. Cry. He may only be able to listen sometimes.
    4. On my third transfer, I drew up a list of reasons for really wanting a baby, and a list of things we would do if we found out the cycle had failed, again. I cried MANY times as I wrote that list, but that list helped me look beyond my own circumstances and the unfortunate vortex of “lets try this new approach next cycle”. Don’t draw up that list yet, but whenever you feel extremely disappointed, remember that as hard as it may be to imagine giving up on reasons you want a baby, there is and will be gratification in life still.

    I spent so much energy and mind space trying to get pregnant, that once I did get pregnant, I found out I knew next-to-nothing about what it means TO BE pregnant. How would I feel? What can or should I eat? I’m in my third trimester right now, and sometimes I still cannot believe this is happening.

    Lots of love to you and Nick.

    PS – The one thing I recommend doing is acupuncture. Find someone who practices holistic acupuncture and get on prescribed routine of treatments.

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  40. Maureen wrote:

    Hang in there. You are not alone. We’ve been going through this journey for 4 years now thousands of dollars and see no light at the end of the tunnel. They say it only takes one.

    I only have one embryo left and hope to transfer it later this month. Do not get discouraged as stress plays a big role in this whole process. I know its easier said than done. Good luck and will keep our fingers crossed for you.

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  41. Mai wrote:

    Jean , I have been there and know how you feel. Don’t forget dreams can come true. All the best wishes to you both💐

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  42. Anonymous wrote:

    I had 20 and only 2 made it to day 5. I have a healthy happy 11 year old. stay strong!

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  43. So sorry you have such a disappointment. Hoping there is something there to implant and stick!

    I know it may be inappropriate to follow that up with telling you how much I love your shoes, but I love your shoes!

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  44. Carmen wrote:

    Jean – Thank you for the update. There is so much waiting and hoping, and waiting again when it comes to the IVF journey. It only takes one – and I am praying that all 3 are viable for you. Big HUGS to the both of you.

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  45. Helen wrote:

    Hi Jean, thank you for opening up about your fertility struggles. As a longtime reader I feel it’s my duty to write to you since I’ve gleaned so much great advice from your posts over the years. I think I’m your exact size so all of your recommendations have been spot-on for me! You could’ve kept your fertility struggles in the dark and only revealed positive news if/when it comes, but you chose to share with your readers and that is really generous of you. I totally agree that it’s an Asian thing to keep personal struggles private, and to maintain a picture-perfect veneer is preferred.

    We went through four failed IVF cycles (all with fresh transfers on day 5) before finally being successful at the fifth try (again with fresh). I never had any left to freeze with the first four cycles, and with the last one we had one, which is still on ice now. We are blessed with a three year old boy who is the joy of our lives. I can offer a few pieces of advice, if you’re interested.

    1) PSG was not recommended to us by our excellent doctors. It doesn’t improve your rate of success, and an abnormal result does not mean an abnormal baby (see recent articles other readers have linked). Fresh and frozen transfers have the same rate of success though.

    2) Bed rest after transfer – I stayed in bed for several days after my last transfer, which was the one that worked. Not based on any scientific evidence, but it worked for me. I don’t think any of the other para-medical activities really helped me; I did acupuncture, vitamins, ate pineapples, tried to cook a brown chicken (advice from an asian fertility nurse) etc etc which I really felt was a waste of my time and probably made me more stressed than had I not.

    3) At each step of the way, just think of your next step, just keep looking forward. It helps keep you focussed on what’s important. Don’t linger on past failures. After one transfer I had a positive hCG but it didn’t keep on doubling over the next weeks and just petered out. And another transfer ended up with a miscarriage sometime before 12 weeks – all of these cycles were so devastating. And yet, our final try after the miscarriage was the one that stuck. So you never know what’s to come, even after heartache.

    4) Be with babies: somewhere on the interwebs I read that Iman became pregnant at a really late age (fertility-wise) after having held a baby for like 24 hours. Or was it Madonna. In any case, the point is to look at babies, smell them, hold them, and this might prime your body for accepting the transfer and making it stick. Again, not based on hard scientific evidence, but I’m convinced it also played a part in our success. I spent a lot of time looking at asian baby videos after my transfer, the one that worked.

    5) Lean on your hubby. Total gender generalization here, but I think men tend to be more practical and less emotional than us, especially us on hormones! When it all gets muddied up in your mind, I’m sure your hubby will be able to help you see a different perspective and pull you out of the doldrums.

    6) It’s all worth it in the end, no matter the outcome. If an IVF cycle fails, it is not all for naught because that cycle enabled you and your doctor to see how you responded, what worked and didn’t work, and allows you to plan your next step. Yes, it’s very costly, but it’s a priority above all else really, and you have to make it the top priority even above work, family and social obligations. It’s tough when you don’t want to reveal everything to your work colleagues and you’re constantly skipping out to another appointment, but you have to keep focussed on the primary objective, not feel guilty for rearranging your priorities so that work isn’t at the top as it is for most 20 and 30 somethings.

    Again, thank you for your honesty and I would love to connect if you ever wish to chat with someone who’s been through it all. I know it’s hard to read about others’ successes, because you always have this tiny voice inside wondering whether it’ll ever be you. But rest assured that you have everything going for you – three frozen embryos is an excellent result, plus you’re young. We’re all rooting for you.

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  46. Onna wrote:

    I’ve followed your blog for a long time for your style and I really appreciate you sharing your journey on the personal side. It must be one of the hardest things for a woman and a couple to go through. Sending you lots of love and keeping fingers crossed.

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  47. ma*qui wrote:

    Hang in there..!
    At the age 41, I had 2 retrievals and they could take 27 and 19 eggs . Ended 3 and 2 embryos for genetic testing and 1 and 1 came back normal.
    Transferred both 2 and now I have one year old healthy boy and girl twins .
    I did retrieval at the age of 41, pregnant at 42. Compared to my case, you are much younger and have better chance.
    I know all the fertility process is tough and depressing … but you are not alone, all the girls here are with you!!!! xoxo

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  48. Molly wrote:

    I’ve always been so inspired by your blog, but your latest posts have really made me a bigger fan of yours. Thank you for being so open and honest!!!
    I will be praying for you!!!

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  49. Psk wrote:

    Hi Jean,

    I wish you the best of luck. I read all your blog comments as well, as I have been trying for 4 years, and it gives me comfort still to hear all the stories.

    Even though embryos aren’t the issue, we have had many other failures, and at this point I have decided whatever is meant to be is meant to be.

    We are trying surrogacy for now and I have decided no more IVF for me, and adoption is an option as well.

    The best advice I can give you is go with your gut, everything else will fall into place, and try to have a life outside of all of this if you can.

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  50. Cat wrote:

    Its ok Jean…for us, out of 14 eggs harvested, only 4 fertilized and only 1 made it thru genetic testing. And now, I have a beautiful baby boy 🙂
    I know it is extremely disappointing and disheartening to hear such news, because I too cried when I heard the results. But happy endings do happen, and I pray they happen for you and Nick!

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  51. Leigh wrote:

    You have so many people rooting for you. So, so many. I am praying for you.

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  52. Michelle wrote:

    Stay strong. I am a 7-time IVF veteran. I never got more than FIVE eggs in any one retrieval. Despite only having two or less embryos (some with such terrible quality they had no chance!) to transfer each time, thankfully two became my miracles. Believe.

    Posted 11.9.17 Reply
  53. Sarah B wrote:

    Hi Jean, stay strong! Keeping you and Nick in my prayers, I know one day it will all workout! Don’t loose hope.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  54. Gaelle wrote:

    Thank you again for sharing. Please remember that it only takes one 🙂

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  55. Anonymous wrote:

    Best wishes to you Jean! I know from personal experience that having your body not functioning how you need it to is supremely frustrating. I hope that your doctor is working with you and share your goals and that you have a good support network. I’m glad that you are sharing your story on your blog in spite of the difficulties.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  56. Gillian King wrote:

    Thank you for sharing your story. IVF is roller coaster of emotion but hang in there. Some day you will share this story with your children and they will know how much they were loved.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  57. Anonymous wrote:

    It took us 6 rounds of IVF, 4 years, 100k, an extended medical leave, and the life changing generosity of an altruistic surrogate to have our twins. It’s hard to explain the pain and effort of all the “small” things that add up. We had garbage bags of medications and needles at the end. It’s so very hard but the upside is the connections that can be made with people going through the same stuff. I appreciate the privilege of being able to do this crazy process that so many people can’t accesss or afford. I’m hoping for you that all this will be a memory sooner rather than later and will bring you the result you want.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  58. Anonymous wrote:

    Thank you for sharing your journey, you are not alone. My husband and I did IVF and also left the retrieval on a high, but only 7 fertilized and 4 made it to day 5. It’s hard not to be disappointed after all the work you put in. We didn’t do generic testing and transferred one, another one made it to freeze. Well, I am now pregnant and expecting soon, there were a lot of disappointments leading up to this for us, but staying positive was the only thing I could truly control. I wish you the best! Stay optimistic, the cliche is true, it takes one.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  59. Val T wrote:

    You probably heard this a million times, so I appogize for yet another advise – but in my case it was a matter of low body mass (i am part asian) and likely not enough good fats in my diet that seemed to be the problem. Did not need to do ivf, but did switch my diet to include a loooit of good fat. Including raw butter/milk very lightly cooked eggs, bone broth etc. Wellnessmama.com has a fertility protocol, that explained a good deal about fertility hormones and their connection to the amount of good fatty food. You seem to eat well, but maybe you will find it helpful. Strangely enough, not many conventional doctors know about it and are still affraid of cholesterol.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  60. Libby wrote:

    I really can’t express how meaningful it is that you are sharing your infertility story. It can be so isolating.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  61. Lauren wrote:

    Hi Jean. Fellow Bostonian, South End-er and IVF patient here. My husband and I did two rounds of IVF with ICSI. Of my 31 eggs retrieved, 17 fertilized but only 5 made it to day 5. They implanted the best looking 2, and we were blessed with a baby boy ( he’s almost one). It only takes one embryo – that was our mantra and it kept us positive. It only takes one. Sending best wishes to you and Nick. I’m praying for your “one”.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  62. Heather wrote:

    Jean, I’m rooting for you and Nick. Thank you for sharing your in-progress story. Your style is impeccable, but more so, you are an incredible writer and person. You have lots of support regardless of where your journey takes you.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  63. Kim wrote:

    Hi, Jean. Thank you for sharing your update. Your blog has been such an encouragement to me, and your story this week has touched my heart. For what it’s worth, here are a few thoughts for those days when it may be tempting to feel down. 1) We’re living in amazing times of innovation–medical and otherwise–to the point that it’s not possible to keep up with all the breakthroughs! If it doesn’t happen for you and Nick in 2017, 2018 may offer a brand new IVF technique that changes everything. 2) As others have already commented, so many times we hear of someone who became pregnant naturally, after having long given up trying–and even after failed fertility treatments. It happens. 3) I personally have had a number of friends tell me about a sister, daughter, or friend who for years could not conceive–yet who suddenly became pregnant after having recently gained 5 or 10 pounds, even if her cycle was already regular. Hugs and best wishes to you and Nick.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  64. L wrote:

    I’ve read your blog for several years, although this is the first time ever I choose to comment on a post as my english is not the best.

    It’s been such a pleasure to read your blog, in fact it’s one of my favorites. You are my style idol and admire you for being so open about such a sensitive topic. Just wanted to tell you that both my brother and I are a result of a failed IVF process. My parents had several trials and failed each times until they gave up and for some reason my mom got pregnant 2 years after they finished the treatment even though the doctors had told her that she couldn’t get children without help, they received two. Same story goes for my boyfriend. His mother and father had tried to get children for 5 years and then suddenly they got twins.

    Never give up! You seem so strong and I send you the best of luck from the bottom of my heart!

    Xx
    You’re biggest Norwegian fan

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  65. Anonymous wrote:

    Jean- you are my hero. I am an avid follower of your blog but never commented. I went through the egg freezing process since I don’t yet have a partner and getting to that age.. the result wasn’t what I expected and it was a lonely experience to have gone through myself. It is an emotional process indeed. I really appreciate you sharing and hope you find comfort in our shared experiences going through the fertility treatment process.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  66. Rajal Patel wrote:

    Hi Jean,
    You are so brave and thank you for sharing. i look forward to your blog and insta posts everyday. I love all of your posts. I am sending you and Nick lots of positive thoughts and prayers. I hope all of the embryos are healthy and you will soon be a mom. 🙂

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  67. You lady, are a total rockstar, keep being brave and striving forward and I’ll be sending all the good vibes your way!

    Rebecca
    xx

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  68. fellowwarrior wrote:

    Jen,
    I am going through this exact thing and I wanted to tell you that I only had 11 eggs which only 8 were mature. I am 34 and thought I’d have much more eggs. My husband kept telling me it only takes one but it is hard to have hope when you hear the numbers keep dropping each step which makes your heart stop a little each way. I ended up with 5 that were able to fertilize and was crying at the thought that only half would possibly make it to day 5. After waiting I only had 2 which had me thinking if I should just forego the testing, but ultimately went ahead with the testing and both ended up normal. In the end it only takes one so try to keep hopeful. It’s been a whirlwind of emotions and as I embark on my first transfer in a week I will keep you in my mind. It’s not about the quantity but the quality and just keep reminding yourself that it only takes one good one.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  69. Christina Y. wrote:

    Hugs to you! I’ve followed your blog for years and hope that your dream of becoming a mom will be realized soon. I think it’s really brave of you to share something so deeply personal!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  70. MANUELA wrote:

    All the love to you and ur Nick, Jen. #respect

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  71. Bbhatt wrote:

    I read all the comments that gave me courage and hopefullness as I see a fertility expert soon. I have one daughter and recent 3 miscarriages and eptopic pregnancy.
    We all are praying for you. Hugs

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  72. BRANDI wrote:

    Hi Jean! Ive been a reader of your blog for over 6 yrs now, never commented before. I was googling petite fashion and found your blog and I have enjoyed it so much! And the peeks into yals life have been sweet. My husband and I have been married almost 13 yrs and we do not have children although we are more open to the idea than we used to be. But i completely understand all the questions and judgment you can get from people wondering ‘when’ and ‘why’ and ‘why not’.. I truly admire your beauty, class, style, courage, and heart and I hope for the best and success for you and Nick! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers! Love ya! B

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  73. Anonymous wrote:

    Dear Jean, I pray God will be with you through this difficult time, and give you strength and health to the best outcome. I’ve been married for 15 years now, and still waiting for that miracle to become a Mother one day. It’s truly painful for me to not yet able to give my husband a child/be a Mom. But I believe when the time is right, God will bless us nothing but the best. And for that, I’ll keep you in my prayers and looking forward to your great news! Take-care, Jean.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  74. Jandrew wrote:

    Life never gives you more than you can handle ! Stay strong and support each other !
    Jandrew
    Dress The Part

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  75. Lyana wrote:

    We love this classic, chic look Jean! You incorporated gorgeous use of contrast with the camel coat and form-fitting black. The belt is a nice touch, adding warmth and color coordination. Thank you for the inspiration!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  76. Amber Robinson wrote:

    I’m a long time reader of your blog (and have some amazing outfits thanks to you!) and have also walked down the path you and your husband are on. At my retrieval, the doctors were able to get 14 eggs but only 3 were viable. My husband and I decided to put in all 3 and we now have a beautiful and strong daughter who recently turned 5 . I know this journey is incredibly hard and one you never hope to take. Thank you for sharing your story. My thoughts, prayers and baby dust are with you.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  77. libby wrote:

    Jean, Thank you for sharing your IVF story, I really do think it makes it easier to be open about fertility struggles both for yourself and for others going through the same thing. I went thru IVF 2 years ago post many failed IUI attempts and now have a healthy 16 month old boy with 3 frozen embryos. Don’t be discouraged by the attrition, that is par for the course when dealing with IVF as remember that even though you had a lot of eggs taken, probably not all were really mature enough to fertilize. I wish you the best in the process. if you have any questions please feel free to reach out!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  78. Anonymous wrote:

    Jean,

    Thank you for your raw honesty. It was so very brave for you to open up about your journey. I hope the best for you guys, and with every door that closes, another window will open. Things always happen for a reason. Much love you you. xoxox

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  79. Mi Jia wrote:

    Dear Jean,

    Thank you about these posts. I myself are not in that stage of my life yet, and I may never give birth to a child, but I think it is important we, women, talk about things openly without feeling ashamed. I think you set a good example for all those women who have similar problems. bravo!
    I do wish you become a mom soon but whether that happens or not, stay happy and stay positive!

    Best wishes,
    Mi Jia

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  80. Mel wrote:

    Good luck Jean! I probably won’t want kids (90% sure), but in the last 18 months I have been considering egg freezing just in case, especially since my company covers it (I work in tech, yea lucky us). One of my friends (co-worker as well) froze her eggs last year. She did 2 rounds and explained the process to me. Another friend of mine just started her embryo freezing right now. None of them are challenged in the fertility department I don’t think, but both are in their late 30s: One is not married yet and the other one wants another 2 years to focus on her career. Thank you for being open about something so personal. It takes a lot of courage. I wish you all the best, Jean. You know that all your blog followers are cheering for you.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  81. Such a cute look. Thank you for sharing your story. It is such a brave thing to do. Love how real you are. Love that you are able to put yourself in a vulnerable situation by sharing. Being vulnerable is brave and takes courage and strength. Thank you. We need more real people out in this world full of social media today.
    xo, Meghan | http://tanlinesanddaisies.com/

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  82. anonymous wrote:

    Hi Jean, thank you for sharing your story. I am also undergoing IVF (but with egg donor). we had 13 eggs retrieved, 10 fertilized, 7 day 5 blasts, 6 undergoing PGS testing. so we ended up with 3 normals and 1 mosaic.
    i underwent embryo transfer two months ago, but it didn’t stick. i am scheduled to transfer my second embryo in december and crossing my fingers that it will take the second time around.
    the process is so emotionally taxing..not to mention the daily injections of progesterone. my butt still felt sore a month after the injections ended. i just wanted to wish you luck on your journey and hope that everything turns out well 🙂

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  83. Shloka wrote:

    Firstly you look beautiful and I love this coat. Secondly, don’t loose hope beautiful! there is always hope and just surround yourself with positivity and positive energy – I know I’m sending that your way!

    x
    Shloka
    http://www.thesilksneaker.com

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  84. Arts wrote:

    Dear Jean

    Thank you for sharing. Keep breathing, keep praying. You’ll soon hold that bundle of joy and all this will be worth it. Good Luck and much Love.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  85. Anonymous wrote:

    I went through this journey myself and all I can say is, don’t give up hope. It took 9 rounds of IVF till we were blessed with our oldest son. It took only 2 tries for my younger son. Your doctors of course know best but I never had any luck with frozen embryos – we always implanted after 5 days. That might make the difference for you too. Finally, we also changed doctors after the 1st try when a very large number of eggs were retrieved but none fertilized. I think that also made a huge difference. Something to think about.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  86. Amy wrote:

    Thank you for sharing your story. I am in a similar spot and completely understand what you are going through. I couldn’t even tell my parents about this because they would think I’m a failure for not having a child (Asian parents for the win!) I also felt disappointed when I went from 7 eggs, 3 that were mature, and only one made it to day 5 for freezing. Hang in there and wishing sticky baby dust for you!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  87. Mania Dallas wrote:

    Hi, Jean,
    I have never commented here before, but I just wanted to let you know that I am praying for you and Nick during this very difficult time. It was so brave of you to share this extremely personal journey, and it was equally brave of you to keep your struggles to yourself. I just wanted to let you know that I think ALL of your readers will support you no matter how you deal with the pain you are going through – sometimes only you will know what is the best way to get through this… whatever happens, NEVER think that you should feel “guilt” for coping in ways that may be different than others. You are SO strong even if you may not feel like it right now. Some day you will look back on this and it will be worth it all when you have children! Hang in there girl!
    God loves you!
    All my love,
    Mania Dallas

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  88. Anonymous wrote:

    Jean,
    Thank you for sharing your story . I have been following your blog for years .
    Keep beveling and hang in there . I wish you all the luck, blessing . Hang in there . Hugs

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  89. Melissa wrote:

    Thank you for sharing! My husband and I have started the whole infertility treatment recently as well and it’s also been very emotional for me too. I understand everything you are going through and I hope that that we all can be a support to each other. I also feel alone in this and no one understands so I do thank you for sharing your struggles. I was also curious on your last post you mentioned that the insurance found some abnormalies and you were able to get covered. Not sure if you are open to sharing but what kind of abnormalities did they see? I am very glad that your insurance covered infertility treatment as mine and many others do not which is so sad. Thank you again and it really encourages me that I am not alone.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  90. “With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts” Eleanor Roosevelt

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  91. Anita wrote:

    It is so difficult to talk about infertility. Thank you for doing so! Your original post so eloquently described all the complicated feelings that come along with IVF. The physical part is tough but the real burden is emotional–so much uncertainty! I’ve been through 3 IVF cycles and 1 frozen. The last cycle resulted in half as many eggs as the doctor was expecting because I ovulated early. I was so worried (like you are now!) that we would not have any embryos to transfer. But even with only six eggs, we ended up with two to transfer and still have an additional embryo frozen. So getting less than optimal results doesn’t mean it won’t work! I’m also older than you (39 with that last cycle), which makes success even harder but we still ended up with two healthy boys. Good luck with the rest of the process and thank you again for being brave enough to share your experience!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  92. Anonymous wrote:

    I have been a long time reader and your last post strike a special spot. We are almost at the same spot with my egg retrieval on Saturday and I now have 3 embryos on Day 4. I know all clinics are different but I do encourage you to consider transfer on day 5 versus freezing and doing genetic testing. It seems like a big risk on one embryo when it might not recover from freezing and thawing. If there are chromosome anomalies, it will likely not implant anyways. So for me with limited eggs – it’s a no brainer decision. I know my doctor would usually even transfer on day 3 if he didn’t think the embryos will make it to day 5 – better chance in the body. I know all clinics are different and all doctors are different. Wishing you the best and you are not alone.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  93. LK wrote:

    Praying for you and your husband!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  94. Annie wrote:

    Thank you so much for sharing your experience with us. Keep crying and let your emotions out. It’s good. Prayers your way.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  95. HoldingOnToHopeWithYou wrote:

    Hello friend. Been following you for years and my heart hurts for you. We have been there too. The constant emotional roller coaster of hurry up and wait. Will be thinking about you. It’s probably hard to see that right now but hold onto hope. I have seen it so many times that all it takes is one good embryo. <3

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  96. Caroline wrote:

    Thank you for sharing your story. Infertility can be a lonely and isolating journey with many hardships and setbacks along the way. As a half Asian woman I have gone through a 4-yr infertility journey with 2 rounds of IVF, countless FET’s, and lots of tears along the way. Allow yourself the time to mourn the “could have been”, but know that with every next step you are that much closer to fulfilling your dream.
    After switching to a new clinic and treatment protocol (endometrial scratches, PGS testing, blood thinners) I now have an 8-month old little boy! If nothing else, infertility has taught me to have greater compassion for those who are struggling with difficulties in their lives. Never give up hope! It only takes one!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  97. Barbara wrote:

    Your honesty, strength, optimism and openness is an inspiration to so many, some who are on a similar emotional roller coaster. May you be blessed with good news soon. (it only takes 1 egg, may it be the blessed one!) We are all here supporting you!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  98. Yi wrote:

    I want to say you look wonderful in that outfit!
    I will pray for your journey to a successful IVF. Stay strong!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  99. April wrote:

    Oh Jean… I was so touched by your story. Having gone through infertility I can understand all too well the emotions you are feeling right now. Try to stay strong and even though it’s hard to imagine things will work out. I have known so many women with infertility who have been through what you have gone through and they do have children. If you want children you will have them, and it may just take a bit longer.

    April | https://thebluehydrangeas.com

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  100. talia wrote:

    Sending hugs and prayers to you and Nick. Thank you for sharing such an important journey. BIG hugs…

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  101. Katie wrote:

    Thank you for being so open about this journey. Infertility and all that comes with it are so common, yet so isolating. The more women who speak out, the more the stigma will fall away, and the more we can easily support each other through these difficulties. So thank you.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  102. Becky wrote:

    Thank you for sharing your story, Jean. I have been following your blog for many years. Your style is lovely, but you are also a beautiful person. My heartfelt wishes to you and Nick for this difficult journey. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  103. Alina wrote:

    Thank you for sharing your journey.I hope that everything will work out .Sending prayers and hugs❤️

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  104. Sue wrote:

    Hi, Jean

    I’ve been following your blog on and off for years and I read from somewhere else that you posted something about IVF. I was surprised by your courage but didn’t come to read it. Until my friend chatted with me about how your post touched her deeply and gave her a very different perspective on IVF.

    So I gather enough courage and come to read it. Yes I got tears in eyes after reading. I feel so strongly partially because I’ve experienced it as well. I started everything 4 years ago and wanted to have a girl sooooo much at that time. I got 21 eggs retrieved and only got 3 embryos passing gene test! Frustrated but still hopeful, I had the only girl embryo implanted soon.

    But it failed. The pain was hard to describe. To this day, every time I think about it, it still hurts. It hurt even worse than when I had miscarriage a couple of years ago. I didn’t know why. Maybe it’s because I knew it’s a girl and I wanted a girl so much?

    It took me a very long time to recover emotionally and started trying again. Now after 4 years, I recently had my last embryo transferred and this time I was tested to be pregnant a few weeks ago. I was preparing myself to accept one more failure and move on with life. And here it comes. You just never know what’s there for you at the next corner.

    I still have a long journey in front of me. Things could happen anytime in the first 12 weeks. I tell myself to hope for the best but be prepared for the worst, always. Because it would hurt so much when you don’t.

    I have no doubt at all that you will SUCCEED in IVF. And probably very soon. You started it at a young age and technologies are getting better every year. I read many IVF stories and there are many many very difficult cases that all succeeded eventually. Some started at an age over 40. Some had to go through more than 5+ implants. They just stick to it and don’t give up.

    I look at life quite differently after going through IVF. Your probably would too.

    Being a mother means being strong. You are a strong girl. When you feel weak and helpless, thinking about it this way: all these frustration and pain will only make the final happiness even happier.

    All the best wishes!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  105. Maria wrote:

    As an IVF veteran, you only need ONE to work!!! In my case, we had lots of eggs after retrieval and numbers went down considerably. I never had more than two who survived five days.
    Keep your hopes up!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  106. Heidi wrote:

    You are such an incredibly, strong person! Thank you for sharing such a personal story and your progress on how it’s going! I, myself, personally have not experienced it, but I have family members who have gone through the same experience as you (which eventually turned out well and I wish the same will happen for you too!). So hang in there! 🙂
    On a side note to your coat post-it’s gorgeous! I noticed that J Crew doesn’t have such a great fit (at least, not on me). So it’s a bit unfortunate that they don’t have it in petite…

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  107. Danielle wrote:

    Good luck to you. We ended up with 4 embryos, and all 4 were PGS tested and normal and now one of those embryos is our baby boy. 3 is great! Keep up the positive vibes, I know waiting is soo very hard. I look forward to your future posts on pregnancy fashion:)

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  108. Mina Nguyen wrote:

    Don’t ever lose hope and give up on hope! Soon, you will receive the result you hope for! You and Nick will be great parents whom a child could want nothing more! Keep on trying and believing and always stay positive! I am looking forward to hearing good news and your posts!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  109. Regina Wu wrote:

    I really want to say something now. I have been following your blog several years and really like your postings. As a busy mom, I don’t have time to go shopping for myself normally. I found your postings are really helpful to choose the great outfits.

    Having babies is one of dreams most women have. As a mother of two, I suffered before I could have two healthy babies. Don’t want to bore you with all the details. One thing I would suggest is to gain weight. A Chinese actor had same experiences when she first tried to have babies. She shared she was too skinny. I would suggest you to gain some weights. This might help in some ways.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  110. Laura G. wrote:

    My friend only had 3 viable embryos and is now 28 weeks. It’s totally possible! Stay strong, pretty lady!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  111. Meredith wrote:

    I didn’t have many eggs in my retrieval (8) and only half of those made it to implantation day. The embryo that was implanted was only a “B” and I worried everyday for ten days and then I received the best phone call ever and now my little “B” is a beautiful and thriving 19 month old! My best advice is to rest and be horizontal those three days afterward and really take it easy the following week and drink lots of fluids! I also think ICSI and acupuncture helped. Wishing you all the best! ❤️🙏🏻❤️

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  112. Michelle wrote:

    I wish from the bottom of my heart that it works out and applaud you for such a honest post . We went through four years of up’s and down’s as we already had a little boy naturally it never crossed our minds that we would have such problems….and like most people thought we could just decide how many we were having !! We decided to throw everything at it last year before our heads were melted completely and went with IVF we went from 14 eggs down to 2 with 2 being put back in 1 did not take and to our joy one did take !!! As I am writing this with tear’s in my eye’s I am looking at my beautiful four month old baby Lucy : ). I know everyone journey is different and most people would be happy with one but for is it just felt that our family and our longing was missing someone .
    I wish you every success and anyone else out there trying it is not an easy road xxx

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  113. Joylyn Dumadag wrote:

    It is a nice change to read a personal post every once in a while, and thank you for being brave to do so. I wish you and your husband the best of luck. Have faith.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  114. Anonymous wrote:

    Jean,
    Thank you for sharing your story – I shared it with my husband as well because we’re also going through the IVF process and it’s comforting to hear from others in the same boat. We’ve definitely learned over the last year plus that IVF is a journey… our first transfer was back last winter, resulted in a pregnancy (seemed too easy and it was) but unfortunately we lost the pregnancy around 7 weeks. After several more months of surgeries, failed cycle starts, and basically being a walking hormone, we just finally had our second transfer two weeks ago and I go in for Beta testing today. I know what a tough, crazy, emotional, challenging road IVF is – we have to just keep having faith that it will ultimately be worth it when we have those beautiful babes! Wishing you best of luck as you continue your journey.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  115. Jenny wrote:

    The last post you wrote made me cry like a baby. I wish there was a magical button I could push to grant your wish to become a mom. I’ve been there and went through everything you are going through now. We were lucky enough to have a 2 year old via IVF but it took 2 cycles and 2 frozen transfers. We just had a failed cycle in August because nine of our embryos survived day 5. It is heart breaking but we are optimistic and will start another cycle next month. Jean, hang in there. It really just takes 1 embryo to stick. When you prepare for FET, get yourself on a warm food diet. Keep your body warm with warm water, soup etc. My Chinese medicine doctor told me that doing so makes the uterus warm and inviting for the embryos. Also, if your doctor hasn’t mentioned an endometrial scratching before the transfer, ask them about it. It helps promote growth factors for better implantation. Also research medrol dosepack if you don’t see it on your protocol before transfer. It suppresses any inflammatory reaction that might occur between the embryo(s) and the endometrial lining. Good luck. Know that I’m always thinking and praying for you & Nick.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  116. Valerie wrote:

    I just helped my cousin through all of her IVF treatments and having her beautiful twin boys last year, so I know this whole process all too well. Just keep moving forward with a positive mindset and remember that it’s okay to feel stressed, it’s okay to not “just ignore it”, and it’s okay to get frustrated. Just don’t let those feelings stop you from doing what you need to do to be happy. I sincerely hope everything works out well for you guys!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  117. V wrote:

    More often than not bloggers make their lives look so effortless and picture perfect, thank you for opening up to your readers and remind us that this is real life and we are more than happy to share every triumph, tear, and success with you. This is what sets you apart and why so many of us remain so loyal. You are more than just a fashion blogger, you have shown us vulnerability, compassion, and that you are human. I hope one day your dreams of becoming a mother become a reality and we will all be cheering you on from the sidelines!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  118. Cielo wrote:

    Hi Jean, I also want to share my IVF story hoping you’ll be uplifted by your followers/readers’ experiences. I live in the home country of Nick’s Mom. In the first 2 or 3 years of marriage every time someone asks if we’re pregnant or makes a joke on why we’re not yet pregnant, I get irritated. I avoided contact with my school friends. Eventually that feeling faded. And it was just indifference maybe (so as not to get hurt) or que sera sera attitude. I get what you mean by getting stressed over trying to not get stressed.
    My husband and I married in 2006 and since that time we’ve had about 10 IUIs from 3 different hospitals & OBs (not a fertility clinic). We were stubborn (or dense?) in going through IUIs since we hoped to get pregnant as close as naturally as possible. Plus the cost of IVF and that time most who went through IVF would go to Taiwan or Bangkok since it’s cheaper there even with airfare & accommodation costs.

    I had my procedure here and the clinic that I went to only does minimal stimulation unlike what you do in the US and genetic testing is not yet available here in PI. And in this particular clinic, payment is by procedure done meaning if after egg retrieval nothing is viable then that’s it you don’t have to pay for the embryo transfer part. In 2014, I had 2 egg retrievals but only 1 embryo transfer which failed. My other egg retrieval did not produce any viable embryo. So in 2016 we tried again, my egg retrieval, my eggs were bad so we didn’t even reach the fertilized egg culture part. And in the second retrieval we got 3 eggs and 2 were fertilized up to Day 5. And now, I have 3 month old baby at 40 years old and after 11+ years of marriage. So hang in there Jean and Nick, continue to do your part in being healthy, having positive attitude and even rest in between procedures and pray for blessings since IVF can only assist up to a certain point.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
    • Linda wrote:

      Cielo – Thank you for writing your story and stating your age. I’m 42 and completed our first round of IVF, which failed. We had 4 embryos make it to day 5 and PGS, 3 were abnormal and 1 did not show a signal. We transferred that one and it failed. We’re not deciding if we want to do a second round which will not be covered by insurance. Cost is about $22k! So happy you did not give up and you have a healthy baby.

      Jean – You just need one good embryo! It’ll happen for you – you’ll be a mommy. Your post made me cry and I remember the moment I got the call – in my office…. totally broke down in tears with the news. Keep praying! Please don’t give up.

      Posted 11.28.17 Reply
  119. Stephanie wrote:

    Rooting for you and Nick and the three front runners!!!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  120. Anonymous wrote:

    Hang in there Jean! I had 18 eggs, 10 fertilized and only 3 that made it to blastocysts. Like you I was completely shocked to have so few. I opted to get genetic testing (ccs) and was even more devastated to find out that we had only one normal embryo…but one was better than none. That one embryo resulted in my 5 month old daughter. I would highly recommend genetic testing, it was definitely worth the extra cost and we paid out of pocket for everything. Stay positive, your journey isn’t over yet…it only takes one!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  121. tl wrote:

    I’m a long-time reader of your blog, but I have never posted. I want to thank you for sharing your story, it takes a lot of courage. My husband and I recently went through the IVF process too– we ended up doing 4 egg retrievals in hopes of stockpiling some embryos since I was close to 35 at the time and we were discouraged by the low amount of embryos that survived day 5 and PGS testing. I know how sad/frustrating and scary it is during this waiting period. We definitely had our share of disappointment with the drop-off rate after retrieving a lot of eggs, but it’ll all be worth it. It’s so easy to dwell on the negatives and the bad statistics, but all you can do is hope for the best and try to keep a good attitude, which I know is easier said than done. But now, after our second transfer, I’m happy to say I’m now 21 weeks pregnant with twins! Sending you all the luck and looking forward to your future coverage of petite maternity styles!!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  122. So many hugs, Jean. I’ve had many friends battle fertility issues, a whole host of them, and it always reminds me how hard it is for women to conceive when the societal message seems to suggest it’s so easy. But it’s not that simple.

    As a fellow AA, I understand the feeling that you’re supposed to keep problems within the Cone of Silence but I found that sharing with people (online only, for me) who care is uplifting and bolstering. I hope that sharing gives you that extra level of support during this difficult time. I wish you all the luck with this round, I will cross everything crossable that that’s all it takes!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  123. Betty wrote:

    Hi Jean, I will pray for you through this trial time.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  124. Akanksha wrote:

    Such a gorgeous outfit! Loved it
    About the IVF thing.. one question, might be stupid.. what if, two embryos stick to the uterus..? Then twins? 😛
    But anyway, good things happen to good people. My best wishes for you guys. Please be optimistic and start settling down – adoption as an option.. I know it is disheartening and absolutely ridiculous to not being able to conceive after all those menses and pain and the fact that we are women! But, sometimes, it’s better to go a different route than put yourself to the misery. And they say that after adoption or surrogacy, so many couples get pregnant!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  125. Deanna wrote:

    My journey with IVF was a very hard journey with a trip to the emergency room so that I could get drained after the egg retrieval. I am so blessed to have a beautiful baby girl. The journey was amazing at the same time because it brought me so much closer to God that one day I was praying about becoming pregnant that I felt his presence it was spectacular. I pray for you and your husband as you go through your own journey. Not every journey is the same but yours is just as important . May God bless you !!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  126. Linh wrote:

    Jean, sending you prayers that all 3 embryos make it! You are incredibly strong. Hang in there! It is difficult but you will get there. ❤️

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  127. Anonymous wrote:

    Hi Jean,
    Thank you for sharing your experience. With every journey there may be tears, but keep your head up and press on. Keep believing in yourself and heart that this meant for you. All this pain will subside, but the strength you’ve gained will never dissipate. Keep fighting, we are all here fighting with you!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  128. Melissa wrote:

    Thank you for sharing your story. My husband and I went through a very similar journey a few years ago when I found through fertility appointments I had endometriosis. It all happened so fast – the tests, meds, failed IUIs, and then the start of IVF. We went through a 1st Dr appt to IVF in about 2 mos. and our lives were forever changed with research and terms and procedures. I also had around 20+ eggs and was hopeful. I got the call the next day that 6 fertilized and then 3 made it to day 5. I felt the same as you. Worried, surprised, but overall I prayed and prayed and was hopeful. We transferred the strongest day 5 embryo and froze the remaining 2. Almost 3 years ago our beautiful daughter was born and this past June our 2nd daughter was born. We have 1 embryo left. Trust your Drs and pray and keep the faith in your heart.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  129. Wow… that’s a lot to take in. I hope it all works out! Keep strong. Love your battle look btw! 🙂 Take on any challenge head on with your lovely outfits!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  130. Pamela wrote:

    Don’t worry, those numbers are about the same as what we got on our third try. I know how you feel though because I felt the same way in the beginning. Our first try we had 21 eggs and 0 made it to day five. We were devastated. Then to top it off I had severe hyperstimulation after egg retrieval which lasted two weeks. We had zero again make it to day five on our second try. We almost lost hope. I regrouped and did acupuncture for several months before trying again with a different doctor. Now we have two beautiful one year old boys. Don’t feel discouraged. It’s not easy but what we learned through it all was to just take it one day at a time while we waited for each result. It will happen for you guys. Believe, trust, don’t give up.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  131. Anonymous wrote:

    Hi Jean – I fully understand and support you. I have been in the journey before. I have gone through 3 IVFs, no embryo made day 5. The doctor said that I will not have my own babies. Thank god, I was pregnant naturally after doctor announcement of my infertility. Now I have two kids. I think having day 5 embryos is so promising, more important I have full confidence that you will be a mom and have your own child. Sometimes there are unexpected challenges in our life, those challenges eventually make us stronger. God bless you both. Best wishes to you both.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  132. Krista Kim wrote:

    Jean,
    I don’t have words to describe how thankful I am for your openness and honesty about your journey. As soon as I started to read your last post, I burst into tears. We have been battling infertility for 3 1/2 yrs and it has been the hardest, loneliest , and most soul crushing thing I have ever gone through. Knowing that someone I look up to, is fighting the same battle makes me not feel so alone. Seeing your strength and resolve has given me strength. You are such a gem and I look forward to further updates of your journey as they come. Whatever you do, please don’t give up hope. Keep pressing forward. You are doing everything right. You are in our prayers. God bless you both. With love and admiration, Krista

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
    • Meg wrote:

      Thank you so much for sharing your journey. I’ve never posted on a blog before but I’ve long admired your blog and when I recently read about your infertility journey, I felt inspired to reach out. My husband and I have also been going through IVF without success yet. It’s the hardest, most painful, and devastating thing we’ve ever had to do. There are times it feels like everyone around you has easily gotten pregnant and had happy, healthy babies. Hearing from and connecting with other couples going through this most difficult journey is part of what has kept us hopeful, grounded, and sane. I wish you and all the others who have posted here strength and hope as you move forward!

      Posted 11.21.17 Reply
  133. Mikaela wrote:

    You and your blog have always inspired me, but I truly look up to you for being so strong in this process and also so strong to share something so intimate with your readers. You and Nick will be in my thoughts because I could not think of better parents then you two 💓

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  134. Alexandra wrote:

    ☹️ sorry about the bad news and happy about the partial good news… I am glad u r sharing your story… our journey was a lonely one as we didn’t want to create expectations… but I think sharing like u is actually a better choice. We ended up with only one healthy embryo (I named it Nemo), that is now my daughter, her name is different 😄. I will be crossing my fingers and hoping everything goes OK. I know there are still more steps…

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  135. Anonymous wrote:

    Hi jean, I will pray for your journey to a successful ivf.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  136. Mai wrote:

    Hi Jean,

    Can you tell me what is the sleeve length on the jcrew coat? Thanks!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  137. Anonymous wrote:

    Hi Jean,

    Sending you and Nick but positive vibes, hugs and love to you guys.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  138. EJ wrote:

    Hang in there. I know keeping the hope alive is so hard and painful sometimes that you want to give up. I almost did after my three miscarriages, but I gave it one last try and I have a beautiful three month old daughter today. Sending so much love for your aching heart.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  139. Aykifen wrote:

    Jean: You are brave and inspire so many of us to be strong as women. I broke into tears reading your last post and was truly touched by your strengthen and willingness to open up and let many of us know that we are not alone. Will keep you in our thoughts and prayers. You deserve what you work so hard for and I look forward to you next update on good news. Love your blog and love you for being so real! Hugs….

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  140. Somewhere in SF wrote:

    Hi Jean,
    Thanks so much for sharing your personal story with us. I’ve known you from reading your blog these past few years and watching your videos and Instagram posts, although we’ve never met, it saddens me to see what you have been going through. Behind that happy face there is always a heartfelt story. Although I’ve been fortunate to have 2 kids, we also struggled along the way. Know that you are not alone and don’t give up HOPE. Stay strong and take it one day at a time! You and Nick will get pass this. I truly believe this will happen so don’t ever let go of your dreams.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  141. Linda wrote:

    Hi Jean,

    I rarely comment on your posts even though I’m an avid reader, but I wanted to post a comment because it really struck a nerve when I read your story. My husband and I are currently trying and going through the same up and down roller coaster every month. It is definitely disappointing every month especially after being so hopeful for 2 weeks. I wanted to thank you for your post and for everyone’s comments because it is comforting to know that I’m not the only one going through this. I wish you the best up luck in your ivf process and hope it is successful! ❤️

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  142. Aykifen wrote:

    Jean: You are brave and inspire so many of us to be strong as women. I broke into tears reading your last post and was truly touched by your strengthen and willingness to open up and let many of us know that we are not alone. Will keep you in our thoughts and prayers. You deserve what you work so hard for and I look forward to you next update on good news. Love your blog and love you for being so real! Hugs….

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  143. Tiffany wrote:

    A couple of years ago, a colleague tagged me in one of your insta posts, commenting on how much we look alike. I’m not as petite but our journeys are alike as well. A little behind you, but staying ever so hopeful for you… for us. Thank you for being so brave and allowing us to be vulnerable together. Xo

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  144. Somewhere in SF wrote:

    Thanks so much for sharing your personal story with us. I’ve known you from reading your blog these past few years and watching your videos and instagrams posts, although we’ve never met, it saddens me to see what you have been going through. Behind that happy face there is always a heartfelt story. Although I’ve been fortunate to have 2 kids, we also struggled along the way. Know that you are not alone and don’t give up hope. Stay strong and take it one day at a time! You and Nick will get pass this. It will happen….I truly believe that. Never let go of your dreams.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  145. Kelly wrote:

    Jean, your transparency is absolutely beautiful. I know that your journey you’re going through now will be an encouragement and testimony to other women who go through the same chapter. Please know that you’re not alone in this. Praying that you’ll be able to embrace, grow, and remain strong during this tough situation!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  146. Jess wrote:

    Thank you for the update. To echo many people’s sentiment- stay strong and positive! Crying is a huge part of this process and as you continue, there will be more ups and downs. But you ARE strong. Sending strong thoughts to your 3 precious embryos. It only takes one! Wishing them the best as they undergo testing. Again thank you for your openness. Sending much love your way.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  147. Shri wrote:

    Sending positive thoughts across for you. I wish you the best in the upcoming testing and implantation.

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  148. Dawn wrote:

    Keep sharing, keep crying, keep praying and just keep believing! We are here for the ups and downs, in our thoughts always!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  149. kim wrote:

    As someone who has been in your shoes and now has two healthy children, I hope that someday this painful process is only a memory for you. I remember seeing the quote “it’s always darkest before the dawn” during my fertility journey and it always stuck with me. I remember all those feelings of sadness and jealousy and failure but once you reach the dawn, none of it will matter. You’re on the other side and every pin prick and every needle (all 146 in my case) will have been worth it. I pray that your three embryos will be viable and that this is the end of your journey and the beginning of a new one, as a mother. 💕 thank you for sharing!

    Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  150. M wrote:

    Hi Jean, thank you for sharing your personal story and as I await for your news know hay God has a plan for you and Nick.

    Posted 11.7.17 Reply
  151. Mizeats wrote:

    Thank you for the update, Jean. Constant love and hugs being sent your way! Praying for you and Nick that you’ll have success with this round of IVF treatment.💙 💙💙

    Posted 11.7.17 Reply
  152. Anonymous wrote:

    It is an incredible thing to share such a personal story. I believe that by doing so that you are giving strength and hope to so many of those who face the same obstacles. Thank you for being so genuine. I believe good things happen to good people, and that your dreams of becoming a mom are about to become your reality.

    Posted 11.7.17 Reply
  153. Anonymous wrote:

    Praying for your dreams of having a child to come true and for continued strength and peace in your journey. 💕

    Posted 11.7.17 Reply
  154. Amy wrote:

    Jean — thank you for sharing your story with us; I really respect that you chose to do so. In today’s day, it’s easy to think that every blogger lives an Insta perfect life. I was really touched that you would open up with us. As an Asian American, I sympathize with it being hard to open up about weaknesses. I hope you never feel ashamed about your body and what it is or is not doing. We’ll all be here along with you and Nick for this uncertain ride and I look forward to more updates, both good and bad.

    Posted 11.7.17 Reply
  155. Sara wrote:

    It only takes one ❤️ That’s a mantra my IVF friends and I have chanted to each other many times. The waiting is so hard. I had a hanger on that was a late grower, which I only learned about when I went in for my second pregnancy. Keep the faith. I wanted to share this article about PGS. It can give you a lot of peace, but it’s also not the holy grail some doctors pitch it as. My friend who struggled through three cyclesbefore even getting an embryo to day 5, opted to not to do PGS when she finally got three. She’s due in April. https://www.thecut.com/2017/09/ivf-abnormal-embryos-new-last-chance.html

    Posted 11.7.17 Reply
    • Heather wrote:

      Omg thank you so much for this article! Our doctor suggested that we do PGS since I had a few failed transfers and miscarriages. I was gonna do it but ultimately decided not to because of the cost and my moderate response. I’m lucky enough to live in a state where insurance covers IVF but I would have to pay OOP for PGS. And with my history of having only a handful of embryos that made it to day 5, I decided we should transfer all the survivors anyways. The end of the article was so powerful as they really would have thrown out that embryo! Somehow I’m also not sure if removing cells from a day 5 embryo would actually cause harm. Thanks again this article definitely made me feel good about my decision

      Posted 11.8.17 Reply
  156. Anonymous wrote:

    Thank you for sharing your story. I wish you both the best of luck. I did 3 rounds of IVF and I read your blog every day during my two week waits and it always cheered me up. So thank you for what you do!!

    Posted 11.7.17 Reply
  157. Anonymous wrote:

    Jean, you are a strong and wonderful woman. I pray that all three embryos will be viable and healthy for implantation, and soon you will be on the journey of becoming a mother. We are here for you. If it’s ok with you, please continue to keep us updated. Sending you lots of love and hugs.

    Posted 11.7.17 Reply
    • Anonymous wrote:

      Keep believing!!!

      I had 14 retrieved of which only 2 made it to day 5. I didn’t even do genetic testing and today, I have two healthy babies. I pray that your day will come soon.

      Posted 11.8.17 Reply
    • Emily wrote:

      Jean I also recommend looking into IVF in nyc where I think Columbia Presbyterian is where my friends went after other IVF drs were not helpful. They tried six years. I say nyc also because there are lots of more experienced drs and cases here, as you are aware.

      Posted 11.8.17 Reply
      • Katie wrote:

        Boston has amazing treatment for infertility-likely better than NYC.

        Posted 11.9.17 Reply
    • Stephani Luecker wrote:

      Reading your post made me want to reach out and hug you. Nearly two years ago today i got my positive beta from ivf… i literally had the same amount of eggs, similar fertilzation and number that made it to blast. We did pgs testing three were normal. We implanted one and now have our daughter. Its a long road but so worth it. Please hang in there. Your not alone. We had a failed attempt as well before we did pgs testing… and two embryos did not implant… it was so hard to continue but im so glad i did. One day at a time… everything will be ok!

      Posted 11.11.17 Reply
    • JG wrote:

      Thank you so much for writing this post about infertility and IVF. I am in my 50’s and my kids are in their early/ mid-20’s. Neither is married yet so having babies is in the future, but I really appreciate you coming forth with your story. I know both my 25 yo daughter and my son’s 22 yo gf both follow many lifestyle and fashion bloggers and take advice from them on what to wear, where to travel to and how to decorate their apts. It makes me feel good when you write such stories and open up about real life struggles and challenges. I trust that if they have such a struggle or challenge sometime in the future they will remember your words and your journey and know that they are not alone. We are very private people too, so I know it can be difficult to open up about something so private, but I know you will help many with your words.
      PS – also being petite, i love your style!!

      Posted 11.11.17 Reply
    • Paula wrote:

      Three is good!!! Retrievals are the hardest part of this journey. I did 2 consecutive retrievals /5 day transfers that didn’t take. I then took some time off and transferred 3 of 5 embryos left. Sadly they ended in an ectopic pregnancy. I took a nother break and transferred the last 2 and we now have a beautiful 3 year old. This is by far the hardest thing I have ever gone through and I wish so many people didn’t have to go through this. Don’t give up it works the transfers will be easier that the retrievals. I felt so relaxed when I was going through the frozen embryo transfers. Wishing you a happy ending!!! In the end it will work!

      Posted 11.12.17 Reply

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